The happiness of little children is amazing to watch. They find joy in the simplest things. Watching them grow can be painful. Part of that process is learning to deal with adversity and “the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to.” Wisdom comes with those hard lessons.

We deal with those painful events in a variety of ways. It’s possible that each of us has his or her own coping mechanisms. What works for one doesn’t necessarily work for another. Unfortunately, many seem to think that everyone should shoulder grief in the same manner as they, and they judge others by that rule.

For those who keep their agony private, those who weep in private and show the world only a stony face or a mere shadow of their pain, family and friends as well as complete strangers can be harsh critics in their misunderstanding. It seems as if only weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth satisfies their prurient, voyeuristic needs.

I’ve come to the conclusion, through personal experience and observation, that those who find the greatest happiness in life also have endured some of the most horrific tragedies and crushing losses. We don’t see the midnight heartbreak, hear the howls of unbearable grief and guilt at surviving and picking up the pieces of broken lives and putting them back together in order to go on, perhaps even to discover again true happiness.

Remember that for those who are left with life to live that is their right to live it the best they can, even to know the happiness that they once knew or maybe even merely dreamed of knowing. If you’re not finished with your own journey, one day you are going to find yourself in need of understanding.

DrDan

05-31-2015